Cant they be friends?. Apparently not.

What’s this about then? Why are there so many zealots in the world? So many people who’d seek to convince, persuade, compel, force other people to believe what they believe? Why be a missionary? Who’s hiring? Who cares? If people wanted your opinion, they’d ask. If people wanted your recommendation, they’d hint. If they wanted your bloody stamp of approval, they’d rather show you the door, so stop flattering yourself.

To the theists:
Who’s your God then? Which one? What happened to the old religions? Did they exist too? Is there anarchy, aristocracy or totalitarianism in Heaven? Oh, sorry *points to a group in the audience* there’s no heaven or hell, only God, right? So what has this God done for you? When’s the second coming again? I’ll mark it down on my calender and try to keep that year free. The next incarnation or avatar? Do you think this one’ll do home visits to the less pious for once; the ones who really need the proof, the push in the right direction? So what’s rituals about then? Discipline or setting the mood or plain showmanship?

To the atheists:
Do you have proof of your theories? The opposition doesnt, but that’s not your answer. That’s changing the subject, ye deceiving tossers. You gotta admit, religion makes an excellent storybook. The world of fantasy and the real collide, literally in a comprehensive literary manner, and NO, I’m not just talking about the Bible so stop getting excited. Norse, Greek, Aborigine, American Indian, Indian [and there’s so many sub-cultures in there!]: every mythos has its unique charm. Some plots are just way too unusual to be made up. You can make up creatures, you can make up dialogue but the special effects? You gotta see it to know it can be done, right? Splitting the sea? That’s difficult even for Industrail Light & Magic! Even fantasy “god” Tolkien based his most famous book[s] on the World War!

From Desperate Housewives, I quote Bree: “The opposite of love is not hate, it’s apathy.” Elegantly put and true! A Catholic friend said the Pope is misunderstood, and that people either love him or hate him and there’s no middle ground. Bull, I dont care. Which category does that put me in?

So I’m a sinner in the eyes of some lord or the other, for reasons as low down the list as having killed AT LEAST 25,794 ants [un]intentionally[?] to moderate crimes like onanism [what? I’m being objective!] to high up on the list like not giving two hoots in the first place. So? If there’s no god, I’ll still be this rotten and I’ll die and I’ll rot and disappear. If there is, [I havent prepared my “Finally! About time you showed up” dialogue yet], I’ll either be judged for my sins, or be weighed on a balance with a feather in the other plate [oh c’mon!!], or re-incarnated as a lower being or something supposedly [and hopefully, for the sake of the pious and the good] horribly similar. Oooh scary. During which part in this process should I turn the other cheek?

In my limited vision, Godel and Einstein start off at the same point and Godel pulls a fast one. We cant know, [logically], ever. So I don’t bother making an opinion, there’re not enough facts. There’s only one absolute; everyone dies. You know, I think it’s a bleeding miracle I havent ever gone goth before and I never will. Black’s not my favourite colour…what?


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